without you
by littlemissmusicdummy
Summary: I was sad or more likely depressed. Running away from home was never part of my plans but I never really had a plan or whatsoever.  How did I end up so… heartbroken? My FIRST TT fic! R&R! please?
1. Chapter 1

Hey guys! I'm littlemissmusicdummy! *introduce crowd cheering here he he ^^U*

So this is my first fanfic of the teen titans and I LOVE RobStar they're just so perfect together!

Anyways this is inspired by _** story "the truth behind a lie"**_ a story that I love I have read it like 7 times already I mean it's really good.

So special thanks to for giving me the permission to do this! And seriously you are the sweet one!

**Disclaimer: I sadly don't own teen titans, drina is 's character and I only own the plot that comes out of my imagination!**

I was sad or more likely depressed. Running away from home was never part of my plans but I never really had a plan or whatsoever.

How did I end up so…heartbroken?

I put myself on the memories of that day.

I was returning from "the mall of shopping" (as I used to call it) with gifts for my friends. It wasn't a special date but I just felt like getting them something extra to give them with the lucky charms I made.

As I entered I bumped into someone making me drop all the stuff I was carrying "Oh I'm sorry star, didn't saw you" Robin said helping me up "No I am the sorry friend Robin perhaps I should be more careful while I walk" I said picking up all my stuff

He bent down and started helping me.

"It's ok… what is all this stuff?" He said handing me the last bag "Oh jus some stuff I bought" "Ok…" he said and with that I headed to my room. Once I entered I dropped all my stuff and collapsed in my bed. After a while I look up only to find 4 star shaped lucky charms and one made halfway. I decided I should finish it but just when I was about to do it the alarm went off.

I flew to the Ops center only to be greeted by Robin typing like crazy "what is it?" I asked while the others entered the room "A robbery in the main bank downtown. Raven and Cyborg you two try to retain him there Beast boy and I will attack him and Star you keep him away from the citizen ok? TITANS GO!" he yelled

I flew off and straight to the main bank only to be hit by an explosion that made me fall back just in time to be caught by our leader.

"What is going on?" he asked as he stopped the R-cycle "I have no idea" I say as I floated up. Just then a girl with dark brown hair blue eyes and pale skin appeared in front of us behind the robber "Stop" She commanded the robber stopped dead in his tracks "Drop the money and let Robin cuff you" he did as he was told.

Once the police got him we all approached this new girl "Hey that was awesome!" said beast boy "How did you do that?" asked a very curious Robin "I used my powers, I'm Drina by the way" she said extending her hand out to Robin who took it. I smiled at the idea of making a new friend but nobody knew they would regret meeting her later.

I know it's kind of short but I'll try to make longer chapters I promise!

Review!

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You know you want it!

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	2. Chapter 2

Hey guys! Here's second chapter I am so glad and happy you liked the first one!

So here go the thanks! Thanks to Ripplerose, Ne0nAngel (btw cool pen name!) Angst (I really never saw that coming seriously) and again to forever!

You guys are the best!

Oh and sorry for any grammar and/or spelling mistakes I'm not from an English speaker nation I'm from South America actually and I speak Spanish as my birth language so my English is not perfect yet!

Disclaimer: I don't own teen titans or Drina I only own my imagination!

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><p>"Your powers are awesome Drina!" beast boy said "Thanks but I really wish I had more control over them" She said with a sad tone "Well … we could use someone with your powers … So you sure you'll be able to keep up to being a Titan?" Robin asked "Yeas, Absolutely" Drina yelled.<p>

I ran and hugged her "Get of me you little slut" she whispered just for me to hear I immediately let go of her. "Well since we have nothing to do can we have some pizza I'm starving man" Cyborg said. They all agreed.

"Friends I think I will go back to the tower I am not felling the fine" I said I simply needed some space to think "Don't you want me to be with you?" asked Robin with a concerned face.

"I am the ok friend Robin I just need a little rest" I said forcing a smile. All the titans (except Drina) stared at me not buying it but decided they should let it go.

As I flew to the tower my thoughts went to the reasons why Drina had called me a slut. I was not a slut was I? I mean I don't look like one …. Do I?

"Starfire!"

That yell brought me back to reality as I felt someone grab my wrist I looked up to see Raven making me levitate with her. That's when I realized that I was falling instead of flying.

"You sure you are okay?" Raven asked me as we landed on the tower's roof "Yeah I am the fine friend Raven I thank you for your concern though" I said once more forcing a smile "If you need to talk just know I'm here ok?" the pale girl said "Thank you" I said as I entered the tower.

I rushed to my room and finally let some silent tears drop. Why? Why did she call me that? Why was Drina so mean? Have I done something to hurt her?

I went to the bathroom and saw myself in the mirror. More tears fell but not from sadness but from rage .Drina was right I was nothing but a slut and probably everyone in the tower, no, the whole city thought that.

I couldn't take it anymore I slammed my fist in the mirror. I couldn't take watching that slut anymore. Without realizing it I broke down there.

"Starfire! Open the door!"

It was Raven but I couldn't make myself go up and do so!

"Starfire I'm coming in" The half demon declared before opening my door.

I didn't feel anything from then. I didn't notice Raven contacting the others through her communicator nor did I notice when the other Titans came into my room or sat beside me.

"Star you ok?" Robin's voice finally cut through my thoughts

"Does she look ok man?" That surely was Beast Boy

"What's wrong star?" Said Cyborg placing a hand on my shoulder as I only continued to sob.

"We are not getting out what's wrong until she calms down" Raven said and all of sudden I felt tired and calm as I drifted off to sleep.

**Raven's POV**

I stopped meditating as I watched Starfire asleep

"What did ya do Rae?" Beast boy asked "First of all don't call me Rae or you'll hang from the ceiling and second I cleared her mind of all emotions at the moment so she can have some proper rest" I said as I got closer to her and placed my hand on her forehead. I may never show it or say it but I felt concerned after all she was like my sister since we switched bodies.

"She has some fever but she won't feel it since some asleep and cold towels should fix it"

"Raven do you know what's going on?" Asked Cyborg everybody knew Star was like his little sister since they met. "For once I have no clue" I said walking to the kitchen to get some cold water.

"C'mon guys we should let her rest" Robin said walking out of the room and with that we all left

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><p>So yeah this is it I hope you liked it! So what do you guys say should I post next chapter in Drina's POV?<p>

Review!

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You know you want to

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	3. Chapter 3

Well hello there…*avoids the tomatoes being thrown in my direction* I know I know I haven't updated in like 3 months but (there's a but don't kill me yet!) I'm on an exchange program guys I'm on the other side of the world on a bloody boarding school!

So I haven't had time to finish my draft of this chapter and now that I've finished I will update!

i know it is like the lamest excuse ever but it's true! i am really sorry for not updating in a lot of time!

Hope you like it!

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><p>Star's POV<p>

"_She's not worth it" Robin said _

"_I knew she was nothing but a slut" Beast Boy said _

"_No I'm not" I whispered more to myself than to the others while trying to stop the tears cascading down my face_

"_SILENCE!" roared Cyborg slapping me across the face making me fall._

"_Please friends stop you are hurting me" I pleaded trying to get up only to be kicked down again _

"_Who cares slut?" asked Drina the smirk audible in her voice while she grabbed my hair pulling it backward so I had to face them _

"_We never did love you nor cared for you" said Cyborg in a dangerous whisper _

"_It was all pity" Concluded Raven kicking me in the chest throwing me backwards while leaving unable to breathe._

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I woke up with tears streaming down y face that's when I felt a gentle hand in my shoulder

"Sending you t sleep wasn't the best idea huh?" said raven pushing me back to the bed. Once I was lying down again she continued "want to talk about it?"

I shook my head I didn't want to tell anyone about this yet

"Star I hate to be this direct but what happened yesterday?"Asked the half demon

I shook my head again

"Ok then. Want to go for some breakfast?"

I nodded

"I will go to get it. Don't move" she said getting up from the spot next to my bed

"No friend I will go no need to worry about me I am the fine" I said as I tried to get up only to be invaded by the feeling of dizziness

"You sure you are ok? I don't mind at all"

"Oh no! Friend stop worrying about me I am the fine" I said as I headed to the door

"Ok I will be in my room if you need me" said the short haired girl before disappearing

I headed out of my door and to the kitchen.

Once I entered I saw Drina there sitting by herself drinking a glass of water.

"Hello friend Drina isn't it a glorious morning!" I said while spinning

"Oh hey slut! Let's get this straight once and for all. First never call me friend because I'm not your friend; never speak to me I don't like your voice, style, dyed red hair or, ever so annoying, personality generally I don't like you so let's make this easy for the both of us. Is that ok sweetie?" Said the brunette in a mocking tone

And that was it! I wouldn't let her insult me in that way!

"You know what FINE! I will not call you FRIEND nor will we be friends. Let me just make myself clear I was willing to be friends with you but if you do not want to be friends with me then fine! WE SHALL NOT BE FRIENDS!"

Just in that moment a very confused Beast Boy came in

"What's going on? I heard screaming" he said rubbing the back of his head

"Nothing friend I was just discussing with Drina but it is all the alright now" I hurriedly said

"Ok…" the changeling said but then Cyborg stormed to the kitchen

"Who's up for some meat for breakfast?" he asked generally

"What? No way man tofu!"

"Meat"

"Tofu!"

"Meat!"

"Tofu!"

"Just shut up and cook both like every morning" barked raven entering the room with Robin

"Good morning friend Robin" I said once we were all seated

"Morning star" he answered sending a smile in my way

Once we were all eating an awkward silence fell upon us and I knew what was in everyone's mind. Why did I suddenly fall and then have a breakdown?

"So… mind to tell us what was going on yesterday star?" Robin finally said speaking for everyone in the room well minus Drina

"I…" I started but was cut off by a metallic hand placed on my shoulder

"She will tell us when she is ready isn't that right star?" he said smiling down at me while I nodded and mouthed a thank you in his direction.

"Cyborg is right Robin let the little freak be" Drina added with a smug grin on her face

"I…I do not feel the hungry anymore" I said picking up my barely touched food and setting the plate near the dish washer

"Come on little lady you got to eat something" Cyborg said getting up but before he could reach me I floated a little

"I thank you for your concern friend but I do not feel hunger anymore" I said walking out of the room and into my own room.

Once I entered I caught sight of the unfinished charm that lay on top of my drawer.

Seeing it made me smile a little, they represented what my friends meant deciding to use my time in something productive I took the unfinished charm and started searching for the glass and metals that the trinket was made of.

After some time a knock on my door broke the silence that reigned at my room.

"Star… are you ok?"

I got up from my bed in which I was finishing the charm and opened my door only to find the familiar face I plastered the most convincing smile I could muster at the moment

"Hello friend Robin I am the ok. Why do you do the asking?"

"I came to check up on you, all of us are worried you missed lunch and dinner" and that's when I realized he had a plate full of food in his hands.

"Oh is tit that late? I am the sorry for doing the worrying of you friend, it was unintentional, but I am the fine I do not feel the hungry after all but Thank you" I said before I closed the door without leaving him a chance to reply.

I leaned on the door and heard him sight in frustration placed the plate in the floor and dropped himself next to it then I heard soft footsteps coming his way.

"Hard day?" asked the slightly high pitched voice

"You don't know half of it" he answered

"Why do you put up with twit over there?"

"She isn't a twit and we don't put up with her but sometimes feels like it with all the new to earth concept you know?"

"Sometimes you need a break I can see it's hard on you. It must be exhausting"

"At times but I wouldn't change a thing"

"Really?"

"Really"

I looked down to find their shadows barely separated from each other showing how close they were.

There was utter silence and just some soft breathing could be heard until that transformed into jagged breaths full with passion.

And the tears stroked me once again.

"Wow" I heard robin whisper

"How about we go for a date and I'll think about giving you more wows?" She said getting up from her spot and disappearing down the hallway.

I lay on my bed after that. I'm guessing it would be another sleepless night


	4. Chapter 4

Ok I know it´s been a while guys but I´m determined to update as quickly as possible! And sorry for the spelling mistakes if I happen to have one

Anyways on with the story

Disclaimer: I own nothing as we all know

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><p>"Hey Star you ok?" Beast Boy asked me, yet again<p>

"Yes" I answered a little too quickly but smiled anyways

"You sure?"

"Yes, thank you friend" I said before continuing to stare out of the window. It was a gray rainy day, a perfect reflection of my feelings. Though it had been weeks since Drina and Robin kissed and officially became a couple I couldn´t get rid of my feelings for him and to worsen things up everyone in the tower knew something was up with me and I wished so badly that I didn´t knew myself.

Robin wasn´t my boyfriend whatsoever but why did I feel jealous of Drina? Why did it hurt when I saw them together? Why did I feel so betrayed by him? Why did feel so numb inside?

_Because you love him _a voice inside of me answered. As I pushed those thoughts aside I resolved that Robin could date whoever he wanted. I was no one to stop him and I will just have to play pretend for a while.

I tore my gaze of the window when I heard the door slide open and here came the both reasons of my mood. In strode the brand new couple holding hands while peeking at each other from the corner of their eyes.

I could not stand this very long so I got up from my spot and walked past them, not before I give them my best fake smile. Robin seems to see right through it because a second later he is holding my wrist and forcing me to look at him. I lower my gaze willing myself not to look up, knowing the consequences of doing so.

"Are you ok star?" he said as he let go of Drina´s hand to take mine

"I am the fine friend" I mumbled not daring to look up

"C'mon star what's wrong?"

"Nothing is wrong friend why would you think that?"

"You are walking" he said with a smug look on his face. I cursed my stupidity, now everyone knew something was really wrong. I quickly thought of an excuse

"It is nothing friend, it is just that my brother´s disappearance anniversary is in a few days. I am the sorry if I worried you" That was not a complete lie but I learned to accept the pain of Wildfire's disappearance a couple years back.

Comprehension dawned on Robin's face as I jerked my hand and wrist out of his hands and continued to walk down the hallway. I needed to talk to someone and I decided that will be Cyborg not only was he one of my best friends but he was really protective of me and Raven, he even told me that I was his little sister and I was glad I could always count on him plus he knew my feelings towards certain leader of the group.

Once I reached the door I raised my fist to knock and after a few seconds the door slid open only to reveal the half robot behind it.

Before he could even mutter a word a launched myself at him and started sobbing uncontrollably finally letting my grief and pain over take me, he quietly closed the door behind us and led me to his bed giving me a comforting hug all the way.

Once I managed to calm down enough to finally break the hug he looked at me and with a serious face asked

"This is about him and Drina isn´t it?" I nodded as a response

"C'mon Star its ok"

"I think she is only using him friend, I don´t do the trusting of her" I said and immediately felt Cyborg tense up and abruptly pulled me away. I looked up only to his hard gaze towards me.

"You just say that because you´re jealous! She is dating Robin why shouldn´t you? But you know what? You can't always get what you want and in the moment you wanted Starfire! You think you are above us all because you are a princess?! Then let me break it down for you! PRINCESS YOU ARE NOT IN TAMARAN ANYMORE! Just because the biggest problem you ever had was what dress you are going to wear or what shoes match your dress doesn´t give you the privilege to judge people like that! You are so FAKE! God I can't believe I bought your act!" He yelled

I stared at him in disbelieve. Soon enough tears welled up in my eyes but I refused to let them fall. After a moment or two of silence all that sadness suddenly became a rush of anger.

"I am NOT the jealous friend! I also know that I cannot always get what I want in the moment I want it! To add more if you don´t do the remembering I came to Earth escaping from the Gordians plus if you know the nothing about me then don´t do the judging, what or who gave that privilege to you friend?" I started to walk towards his door but before I disappeared into the hall I turned back to him and added "_I_ cannot believe I bought _your _act friend!" My voice dripped with sarcasm before I walked out of his room

I decided that some training would help me calm down so I headed to the training grounds failing to notice the other smirking female disappearing from view.

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><p>ok this was meant to be longer nut i couldn't let you guys wait more so here it is! Again thanks to forever. robstar for letting me use her story as inspiration!<p>

Thanks for reading

review!

PS: I hate making cyborg the bad guy but you'll se why letr on! bye! till next time!


	5. How it all started

Ok so know it took a while but I started class little while ago and we have a completely new evaluation system and every teacher seems to be paid to send me as much homework as they can so yeah

So sorry I couldn't update earlier but until I get settles down with all of this I will not update as fast as I would want to so my deepest apologies

Anyway the show must go on

So sit back, relax and most importantly enjoy!

Disclaimer: should I even say it….*everyone nods*fine… I do not own teen titans if I did well that would be interesting….

As I entered the training area my feelings finally got the best of me making me break down in that moment. My body trembled with sobs as tears ran down my face making their way to the floor.

Why? Oh why? Why did he say that? Did I do something to deserve this? Was this that thing that they call karma? Or was it something just to make me realize that they were never my friends? Did I even deserve this?

My mind raced through the possibilities and unanswered questions as my body continued to tremble until I felt a hand in my shoulder making me jump in surprise. I looked up to see the young changeling looking down at me.

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing friend beast boy" I said trying to hide my face from his view

"You're crying" he said

"It is nothing friend; I am the fine" I said trying to get up only for him to grab my wrist.

Hard.

"Why won't you tell us what is wrong with you?" He screamed at me. I flinched at his tone "Don't you see everyone is worried for you?" he grabbed my wrist harder this time

"Friend let go, you are hurting me" I pleaded in a whisper

"No Starfire. Are you so self-centrated that you can't see we all care for you?"

"Friend, please" my voice was barely a whisper now; my eyes filling with tears once more

"Take this pain and multiply it by ten Star that is how you make us feel!"

I managed to yank my arm out of his grip. The sudden motion making my body fall with a soft thud, that's when I saw the tell-tale bruise forming on my wrist. My eyes widened and instinctively I took a step back.

"Get away from me" I whispered

"Star I-"

"GET AWAY FROM ME" I yelled and ran out of there. Horrible flashbacks of my time with the gordians going through my mind.

No, that couldn't be happening again.

Just then the alarm started to ring. I ignored it and locked myself up in my room. Meanwhile I could hear all the titans getting ready to leave and eventually leaving the tower to fight whoever was attacking the city this time.

When I heard pure silence my emotions got the best of me and I collapsed right there. Sobs shook me harder and harder while my body trembled. My eyes stung with tears that rolled down my cheeks all the way to the floor. And I just couldn't stop; I couldn't control the growing pain inside my chest nor the equally growing feeling of fear or rejection.

Everything around me was confusing, nothing made sense whatsoever. I didn't understand what to do.

I cursed my luck many times then. How did I end up here? How or when did my dream turned into a nightmare? That's when I knew I had to get out of there.

I packed the necessary things and some things that had a lot of meaning for me, some money I had saved in case of emergencies and finally I took out the presents I had bought for my friends and the star shaped charms I had made and placed them in the ops room.

I took out my communicator and left it on my bed next to my fiery red charm and to a letter directed to each member of the tower.

I placed my bag on my shoulder and for the last time walked through the familiar tower halls until I reached the roof. Funny how this all was familiar but I felt like a guest in my own home?

I was leaving. Not only the tower or my supposed to be friends but my life.

For good

From this moment on Starfire was dead.

This was the new me, the one that knew how cruel the world could be, the one that was now heartbroken, the one that was stronger and wiser.

And I was never looking back.


	6. Welcome to my life

Ok guys I'm so sorry I didn't update faster but everything has a reason so please don't kill me yet.

So I got real busy with school and the holidays were coming up and let's face it you don't have free time once they're here but also because of the new school system we had like no vacations at all so my school gave us a week and we have to come some Saturdays to make up for it. Also I got a new laptop from my parents (yeah my last laptop stopped working that is another reason I haven't posted anything) and it didn't have Microsoft at all and we didn't have the code to install it so a friend of mine ( who is half hacker) gave me this cd so I can install it and I did it yesterday

So yeah I'm really really sorry but this chapter is super important and I also wanted it to be perfect so it took me a little longer to make the draft so I really hope you like it!

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything**

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><p><em><strong>-4 years later-<strong>_

**Kori's POV**

Once I stepped out the flashes and clicks from the cameras blinded my vision for a few seconds.

I walked down the runway, last of all models, once I got to the end I stroked a pose and received all of the applause after a while Tim came out with a bouquet of roses and gave them to me with a quick peek on the check. I could see Anna Wintour* smiling at me while she clapped (I was one of her discoveries after all) I smiled at her, gave a small bow and finally walked out with Tim

I was attacked by Tim, Bruce and Alfred hugging me once we were backstage.

"Well done, Ms. Anders" said Alfred while he released me, his already aged face showing nothing more than pride

"You did it Kor!" yelled Tim his blue eyes shining form all the excitement while I tried to ruffle his dark brown hair

"I'm proud of you Kori" Bruce said placing a hand on my shoulder as he looked down at me

But before I could reply the sound of applause invaded the room and once it died I stood up a little straighter and said

"That applause should be for all of you. Without you I couldn't have done this so thank you, all of you, now the fashion line is launched and I'm sure it will be a great success thanks to all of you"

Everyone cheered again and, this time, I cheered with them. I hugged some of the other models and went to gather up my things. We were heading back to Gotham soon.

By the time we got to the Wayne Manor I could already see the set up for tomorrow's party in honor of my new fashion line. Before I could go up to my room Bruce stopped me.

"You still have to train tomorrow, Mid" He said using my superhero name as I liked to call it. I groaned

"It is like 1AM!"

"That's the price you pay" he said with a playful wink "See you at five"

I groaned again but knew there was no way out of it, so I quickly got to my room, changed clothes, cleaned myself from any make up left, took my contacts off and stared at the girl in the mirror for a few seconds.

Completely green orbs stared back

I sighed and tore my gaze away from the mirror, climbed to my bed and fell asleep instantly, I better have some rest while I still can.

I woke up screaming at the top of my lungs just when my alarm clock went off. I looked at my surroundings only to make sure it was just another nightmare. I heard the door open and tim poked his head inside.

"Are you ok princess?" he asked using my nickname, his blue eyes filled with concerned and his thin lips drew into a straight line "Another nightmare?"

"Yeah but I'm fine don't worry" I said, he came in and sat next to me. Once he did that he began to stroke my hair in a gentle way

"Someday you are going to tell me what it is about Star?" he said and I immediately stiffened

"I don't go by that name anymore and you know it"

"Yes I do but the one who just spoke was her not you Kori and it felt right to call her by her name don't you think?" I glanced up at him, even though he was at 2 years younger he was much taller than me, and only saw how sincere and true his words were "C'mon we have to train Midnight"

"Oh shut up Robin" I said pushing him out of the bed (and making him fall on the process) so I could get out of the bed.

I quickly shooed him out of my room and began to search through my training clothes until I picked out a pair of skin tight black trousers, a purple tank top and matching trainers. I pulled my hair back into a small ponytail and exited my room.

When I got to the training room Bruce was fixing something from his Batman costume while talking to Alfred, I pressed myself to the side wall so I could hear their conversation.

"Master Wayne I don't think it is a good idea to bring the whole team here"

"Alfred-"

"No Master Wayne" he cut him off "you should at least warn her"

"Warn me about what Alfred?" I said making my presence known

"You're late Kori" Bruce said not taking his eyes off the costume

"I know, what should I do today?"

"Go practice agility"

"I'll have a talk with both of you, individually because I know Bruce won't tell me what I should be warned about, right Alfred?" I said before I strode off to the agility course

It wasn't until three hours later that Bruce dismissed me but I could still hear Tim training. I quickly went back to my room and collapsed, quite literally, on my bed from then I slept what felt like an eternity. Until my sleep was disturbed, again.

"Ms. Anders wake up" Alfred's soft voice said

"What is it Alfred?"

"It is lunchtime and Master Wayne has asked for your presence, also you already have slept enough"

"OK, give me ten minutes and I'll be down"

"That is alright Ms. Anders" He said in his normal tone. I started to get out of bed and make my way toward my bathroom

"Oh and Alfred"

"Yes?" He stopped and turned to face me

"Who were you talking about in the morning?"

"No one…No one at all" he said a little too quickly for my liking

"Ok then … I'll see you downstairs" I said before entering my bathroom and striping from my training attire, turning on the hot water and stepping in.

Once I was done I wrapped a towel around my body and, after drying myself, I got dressed on simple jeans and a t-shirt and random shoes. I putted on my contacts before I strode down stairs and into the huge dining room.

"Nice of you to join us kori" Bruce said and I simply had to roll my eyes at him.

"I consider myself a very nice person Bruce, so thank you" I said it an overly sweet voice

"Don't look so smug Kori" Tim said

"Have a seat" Bruce said before I did. Once I was seated and the food was served, Bruce tried to make a small conversation.

"We have guests coming to the party" he said

"Of course we do Bruce, if we didn't it wouldn't be a party" I replied while Tim tried not to laugh and failed at it while Bruce, mockingly, glared at us.

"Special guests" he clarified

"Who are they?"

"Just wait and see Kori, I'm sure you'll be delighted to see them"

"Are they going to stay with us?" Tim piped up

"Naturally, for the whole month or more, so you better behave"

"When don't we?" I said trying to sound offended and Bruce just gave me a significant look "OK I promise we'll at least be civil, right Tim?" he just nodded in response

"Good" said Bruce with a small smile playing in his lips

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><p>Everyone was buzzing and chatting with one another while I was welcoming and chatting shortly with everyone, until I heard Bruce talking. I turned to see him in the small stage , which was placed in front of the bar, a glass of Champaign on in his hands.<p>

"Welcome to all of you. Tonight we celebrate yet another achievement of my adoptive daughter: Korianne or Kori Anders. She is just such a creative, kind hearted and generous person with a lot to give back even though life has been hard on her I've never seen that smile of hers disappear. So Kori after all we've been through, good and bad, I've seen you time and time again rise up and fight harder for what you wanted and now you've accomplished, yet, another thing and I can't wait to see what you will bring to us in the future and I'm talking as a father that I couldn't be prouder of you, so let's celebrate. Cheers!" he said raising his glass while everyone cheered and clinked their glasses together.

I couldn't help but shed a tear of joy and smile as he said that. I mouthed a thank you and raised my own glass; he simply smiled and raised his glass.

After a few more congratulating speeches from Tim, Barbara, Anna and some more Bruce told me that the guests of honor had arrived. Unconsciously I smoothed down the non-existent wrinkles of my red dress and followed Tim and Bruce to the entrance. We waited a couple of minutes, which seemed like forever , until I heard the soft clicking of heels becoming a little louder by the second, until it stopped and I finally saw who the four people in front of me and inwardly took a step back after recognizing each one of them

The Titans

Raven, or May I say, Rachel was wearing a beautiful black strapless dress complemented with purple heels and her, now long, hair fell down her back. Garfield, now much taller than me, was wearing a simple tux with a purple bowtie in one of his fingers a disguise ring while the other has holding Rachel's. Victor was wearing black trousers and a dress shirt with a blue tie hanging form his neck he ,as Garfield, was wearing another disguise ring, finally, Richard had black trousers and blazer his red bowtie undone and hanging over his white dress shirt. His blue eyes met mine for a moment and I saw a flash of recognition before it quickly disappeared.

"Bruce" Richard said breaking the silence "it is nice to see you"

"My pleasure Richard" he said while they hugged and once he pulled away he said "May I introduce you to Timmothy Jhones"

"Just Tim" he said cutting Bruce off

"And Kori Anders"

"Nice to meet you" Richard said extending his hand towards me

"I don't mean to be rude but I can't say the same of about you"

"Kori" Bruce warned with a glare

"You can't expect me to be fine with this Bruce. I thought you, of all people, would know better! You even have Alfred to be your conscience and you should have known I would not simply smile and welcome them, at least not after they did to us, what they did to her or have you forgotten already? Huh? Now if you would excuse me!" I said retiring from there my hidden hands glowing bright green and my contacts dissolving.

I ran, ran away from them, I ran all the way to the back gardens , avoiding the party, and once I knew I was far enough of all of it I let a sob scape my lips

How dare he bring the part of my life I wanted to forget?

They would find out eventually but when they knew I would be gone again or so was my plan, but now I couldn't run and I couldn't escape. My past life was here and I had to confront it.

My life as a Titan, my life as an innocent girl, a naïve girl, an alien girl, a princess of another world, a girl who got her heartbroken from her own family, a girl who couldn't escape the pain, a girl who ran away.

My life as Starfire was now back and this time there was no running away from it.


	7. Big girls don't cry

Ok so happy Valentine's Day (late!) I really tried to post this the 14th but the realized I didn't have internet until the 15th so sorry about that!

I'm trying to post everything as quick as possible just so you know and feel free to pm me ideas or something you want to happen between characters because this is your story and you should have an opinion so yeah

Let's get this show on the road!

**Disclaimer: See last chapter**

PS: I just remembered I didn't explain who Anna Wintour is, she is one of the most influencial people of the fashion world and the editor of Vougue magazine so yeah I don't own her whatsoever (and how do you own a person by the way) i simply admire her a lot!

* * *

><p>I kept hugging myself while I sat there wondering if this was some kind of sick joke they decided to play on me, which I knew it wasn't but held to my only hope nevertheless.<p>

I hugged myself tighter burying my face in my knees, wishing with all my will for this to be nightmare and soon enough I would wake up and Tim would come in to ask me if I was okay as every single morning; but it didn't happen so I wished to disappear and never be seen again, for the land to suddenly open a hole and trap me in there or, by some kind of miracle, to drop dead right there. Some more sobs escaped my lips as I thought all of the possibilities but my body didn't want to move just yet.

"KORI!"

Fast footsteps approached me and finally stopped a few meters away from me, I didn't even have to look up to see who it was.

"Kori" whispered a rather breathless Tim sitting beside me and wrapping his arms protectively around me "look I know that what Bruce did wasn't the best idea he's ever had but he did because he cared for you and if it matters, know we won't tell anyone"

"I'm not worried about that" I said as I cleaned my face with my hand

He looked at me with a questioning expression "Then what is it?"

"They won't hurt us again? Right?" I asked in a whisper

"No they won't. I promise princess" He said before kissing the top of my head. I hugged him and he gently hugged me back "We should go inside Bruce is freaking out right now. He's scared; he thinks you're going to do the same as last time princess. Bruce just wants what its best for you, we all do" He said before releasing me and standing up

"Promise me one more thing" I said as we walked back inside

"What is it Kor?" He said before I smirked

"You'll help me prank them right?" He laughed at this and I could see the devious smile on his face while his eyes glinted mischievously

"Sure thing princess"

Once inside we went to my room, avoiding the party, and I cleaned myself up and headed to the party again. We roamed around for a while and Tim didn't leave my side until Alfred reminded me that I had yet to give a speech (as Bruce told me to do) and told me that after that Bruce had called me into his office/ studio to have a talk. I sighted.

Great

Tim walked me to stage and helped me up once there the chatter and noise died almost immediately, the media came to the front and extended they tape recorders and/or they microphones some even had cameras. I grabbed a microphone and walked to the center.

"Well hi guys, I guess, as everyone has already done I wanted to share some word with all of you. First of all thank you for coming tonight it's been a crazy time but I know we've had crazier ones and plenty more to come but thanks to all of your work my first line is out and probably nobody will see it coming. So it saddens me to announce that I will be taking a short break from everything from posing to creating new crazy designs" Everyone stared at me wide eyed at this statement "I am only human guys and I need a break it will be just a couple of months I promise and I'll be back before you knew I was gone I guess it's an I'll see you later" I said before stepping down and walking in Madame Wintour's direction

"I really am sorry if I have disappointed you Madame Wintour" I said bowing my head slightly only to receive a chuckle form one of the most influential people some in the fashion world

"No worries dear, even fashion needs to rest at some point plus you will never disappoint me Kori" She smiled kindly at me "And call me Anna"

"Thank you so much Anna" I said with a small smile playing at my lips

By now everyone had gone back to what they were doing before and chatted among themselves yet again but there were some brave ones that went into the dance floor while the others stayed in the sidelines watching the beautiful dresses flow to the melody and rhythm of music while wishing to be there or summoning enough courage to ask someone to accompany them.

I excused myself from Anna and went up to Bruce's office, after all he would still want to talk to me. I grimaced at the thought as I got there and walking to the room without even bothering to knock; I knew Bruce would be sitting on the sofa near the window looking outside with a glass of wine or cup of tea in his hands

"You wanted to talk?" I said in a monotone voice before I realized there was someone else in the room, and to both my surprise and annoyance, it was no other than the former boy wonder. I was about to make a remark and storm out but Bruce knew me well enough to not let that happen.

"Yes, I actually wanted to talk to both of you, Kori, please do have a seat" He said before I could even open my mouth, he had a smug look on his face, I rolled my eyes at his and his sudden formality.

"What about Bruce?" Richard said eyeing me suspiciously

"Oh puh-lease like I have an idea" I said to Richard with my best HBIC tone and face

"Both of you have to start to act civil towards each other. Am I understood?" Bruce said before Richard and I started an argument

"I am acting civil, Bruce, but she's just and stuck up bitch" Richard yelled I don't know if intentionally or not but before I knew it I had slapped him across the face.

Hard

"Don't you dare to judge me pretty boy! Don't you dare! Because mister I-am-so-obsessed-with defeating-Slade, you don't know me and you can't go around calling me a bitch when you are even a bigger one. Am I wrong? Well then tell me why did little miss innocence run away? Huh? Because I'm sure she didn't have to or she would've told you. Am I wrong Richard?" I said in a sweet tone. I looked at his face and I knew I was pushing all his buttons by now I decided to continue "Or maybe that Drina girl kept you all too blind for you to notice that she was hurting from a long time by then and that none of you cared enough to see it. So don't go telling me I am the bitch because I can sure see another and bigger one here."

I smirked as he looked ready to murder me but simply turned around from him and Bruce, whose eyes were still wide from what had just happened, and started to gracefully walk to the door with the light clicking of my heels now very audible thanks to the silence that dominated the room. My internal Starfire was yelling at me when I looked into Richard's helpless eyes but pushed away my thoughts because she was no longer me and I was no longer her which was good because then I could be whoever I wanted and this was feeling really good in my own eyes.

Just when I was about to reach for the doorknob a voice came behind me.

"Says who? The girl doesn't have an idea of who she is and who will be nothing without Bruce?" Richard hissed to me. I turned around to face him trying to keep a neutral face.

"Well in all honesty yes, Bruce was kind enough to have me here after my family died and my suicide attempt. He helped me be who I am today Richard. It is no secret! And maybe I still don't know who I am but who is a hundred percent sure? I am pretty sure even you aren't that sure Richard. And Bruce, I know you did this with the best of intentions but right now I can't deal with this" I said trying to keep myself from breaking down right there but some silent tears still rolled down my cheeks. What is with today that I've cried like three times already?

"I'm sorry Kori" Bruce said "I do apologize for the both of us, Kor" He tried reaching up to my face to brush my tears away with his thumb but I took a step back and raised a hand

"Don't"

I almost regretted it when I saw his heartbroken expression. Never had I rejected Bruce in any way and today, for the very first time, I had. I watched as he took a step back and nodded.

"You know Bruce, you're always sorry for everything you do but you keep making the same mistakes over and over again and for you to learn the lesson, always, someone's life has to be on the line. And I'm tired and sick of it! You know me better than anyone; and all of this could end and you still did it! Over and over again! You know? I'm not staying with them. I'm going to go somewhere for a couple of days or weeks or months, I don't know. But when I come back I want all of this, sorted out or I'll leave again!" I looked at him, he was about to say something but I cut him off "And don't tell me it is time to face my demons because I know you genuinely care for me and Tim but we all deal with things differently. I'm not patrolling tonight so ask Nightwing or one of the titans to take my place" I said and finally went out of the room and headed towards mine.

Once I got there I immediately changed my clothes into skin tight black jeans with a plain white t-shirt, leather jacket on top of it and combat black boots. I took out a duffel bag and started to throw everything inside it; some necessary things and the ones with sentimental value for me. I opened another drawer and took out some cash I always saved in case of an emergency, took out my bat-communicator and my phone leaving them there , not before I sent a quick text to Tim telling him I was leaving for a while.

I took the duffel and walked down the corridor to the service staircase, it came in handy to know where everything was. I ended in the kitchen and quickly made my way to the garage through another set of stairs, once there I took my helmet and the keys of one to the many bikes Bruce and Tim owned, went to it and started it. With a soft purr the motor came to live. I started the gas and headed out, my helmet covering my face so no one would recognize me and with that I melted into the night.

I drove all the way to the center of Gotham and stopped the bike. Going up into an alleyway I opened a storage room and left the bike and helmet there. This storage room was yet another secret from Bruce, Tim and Alfred. I turned and found my jet black 1965 Ford Mustang, I grabbed the keys from my inside pocket and sat in there, throwing the duffel behind me. It was a car no one knew I had thus making it appropriate to disappear in, now it was really slim chance (next to none) that they would find me.

With the helmet, bike keys and bike long gone by now I started the car and hit the road in a direction no one would suspect to find me and with the Titans gone it was way better. After at least three hours of driving I got there.

Jump City


	8. let it be

I got downtown and into the building's garage. After some time staring blankly ahead I took my duffel form the back seat and took out my car keys heading out. I took a few deep breaths before finally stepping into the elevator and looking at myself in the mirror.

Blood-shot eyes, messy hair, tired face, wrinkled clothes and an overly large duffel bag hanging from my shoulder. I sighed and turned to face the door that, after a couple of seconds, opened revealing a door in front of me. I took out the keys and opened it only to be greeted by the familiar penthouse. I closed the door, locking it, and headed to my room, dropping the duffel in the living room

I walked into my room only to see the breathtaking view, it overlooked the city and I could still see the T-shaped tower in the distance. I tore my gaze away and walked to the bathroom. Turning on the hot water in order for it to fill the tub and prepared myself a bath. After stripping of my clothes, I stepped in and let myself relax. After a long time I stepped out and dried myself before changing into my pajamas and collapsed on the bed before I let all the exhaustion of the day take me and I fell asleep.

When I woke up it was about midday so I decided to go out for lunch and to call Tim. I changed my outfit, put a wig on, grabbed my keys, took some money and headed out. After sometime, I ended up in the pizza place waiting for my cheese and peperoni pizza to come.

"Hey there" someone said behind me. I turned around to see a red headed guy wearing black jeans, a white t-shirt and a red jacket over it with sneakers to match.

"Hi" I said with a smile

"I'm Roy Harper" he said sticking his hand out

"Kori Jackson" I said shaking it. Ok maybe I change my name from time to time but they did not need to know that

"Why is such a fair lady by herself?"

"Well I live by myself and I just moved to Jump" I answered flirtatiously

"Has anyone shown you around yet?" he questioned me again but something in his eyes changed, well this was going to be fun

"No, but I already knew the place. I lived here a couple years back"

"That's just bad; I was hoping to get to show you the tower. You see, it isn't often we have visitors, right midnight?" he smirked before turning to see my reaction

"Well, Speedy, haven't you changed?" I smiled "how did you know it was me?"

He shrugged and sat beside me while he grinned smugly at me. I couldn't help but laugh

"So why are you not in Gotham?"

"Same reason you are not in Steel" his eyes widened slightly in realization. Before he nodded

"Right, so you saw them" he said, it was common knowledge between the heroes and their sidekicks I did not like the titans

"I saw them, got in a fight with Bruce and left"

"Cool" he said while averting his gaze as my order came

"Want to eat together? I have to stay fit and eating a whole pizza by myself is just not a good way of doing it" I said trying to make a joke. It would be nice to spend some time with him before I headed somewhere else. He was one of my best guy friends after all

"Is it an excuse to spend time with me or just to bribe me so I don't tell anyone you are here?"

"A little of both. I pay" I announced before he laughed and grabbed a slice of the pizza sitting in front of us.

We spent most of the afternoon together. After we finished eating we walked around the city and finally settled in a bench in a park near my apartment. He told me how his side of the titans was doing and I told him how things in Gotham were, we pretty much caught up in everything since it was a long time since we had seen each other. When it began to get dark he said he must get going and that I should get home. We exchanged numbers and made him promise he won't tell Bruce where I was or Oliver will find out what actually happened to one of his bets bows.

Once I got back to my apartment I took out a disposable phone I had gotten on the road and made sure it was untraceable before I dialed Tim's number. It rang a couple of times before he answered.

"Hello?" his voice sounded uncertain and cautious

"Hey Timmy" I answered

"Kori?" his voice was surprised and I could imagine his ace at the time, eyes widened ever so slightly and his posture would've straighten up just a little

"Yeah, it's me"

"God princess, where have you been? Bruce is freaking out! He's about to send the JLA to search for you! He is so scared; he thought you may never come back! That he pushed you too far and God I don't want to think about it. Alfred is just as worried Kori! Next time think before you disappear like that. Even the titans are worried!"

"Tim I did think before I went out and you know I wouldn't do that not anymore anyways. I would never leave any of you like that ok? You hear me? I'm ok no need for a search party I'll be back I just need time to sort my thoughts and if you absolutely need me I'll be there, don't worry"

"You'll come back soon right?" he asked in such a childlike voice that reminded me of the 13 year old I first met

"We'll see alright. Connor has to find me first ah and tell Bruce that Uncle Clark and Connor know where I am or at least have more of a clue than you and leave it up to them ok? No need to leave Gotham or anything and don't get the JLA involved please. If I hear any of you have come to search for me, I'm just going to pack and leave again understood?"

"Yeah, but princess come home soon"

"I'll try ok?"

"Ok"

"And Tim?"

"Yeah?"

"I love you"

"Love you too princess"

With that I hung up the phone and went to change my clothes, as I threw on my pajamas I considered calling Connor, just to tell him I'm fine and to maybe vent out a little and too tell him he should be expecting Bruce to call them up soon. With that thought in mind I grabbed the cheap cell phone and dialed another number. I just heard the first ring when he answered.

"Hello the almighty boy speaking"

"Oh sorry wrong number I was looking for Connor Kent, the clumsy one you know." I said smirking at his answer.

"Kori?"

"Yeah, it's me. Why does everyone keep asking? If someone else asks I swear to God I'm going to punch them"

"Sorry, I just didn't expect your call" He replied. Connor Kent was Clark and Lois Kent adopted son, although he was originally a clone of Superman he had taken to being his side kick and was now 18 years old and one of the few people I had come to trust and care as my own family.

"It's ok I was just calling to give you and Uncle Clark a heads up Bruce will either be calling or visiting tonight"

"Why?"

"I may have or may have not mentioned you had a clue of where I am currently" I could actually hear his face palm "Sorry but it is not my fault you help me pick a place or that Uncle Clark helped with the paper work" I heard him sigh

"Wait on the line while I go tell dad, he's probably going to scold you or something" I heard the muffled shout of Connor and their voices as he summed up the situation before someone picked up the phone again.

"Korianne Anders! What in the world where you thinking?!" Yeah Uncle Clark was going to murder me now.

"Hi Uncle Clark"

"Hi? Is all that you got to say? Young Miss everyone is worried about you, especially Bruce. You do know what they were thinking and I don't care how but tomorrow afternoon you must be in Gotham or I'll drag you there myself! How can you be so careless about them? They need you Kori as much as you need them and they're freaking out about every single possibility! How could you not think of that?"

"Sorry Uncle Clark. It's just the titans are in Gotham and I don't think I am ready to face them" I confessed silently. I was never able to fool Superman or Superboy but they agreed to keep my secret and although we met when I was Kori Anders they could see right through it and were able to decipher who I actually was, they and Aunt Lois were key pieces in my recovery.

"it is ok to be scared but Bruce just wants to help and although his methods may not be the normal ones, he just wants you to be happy whether that is in Jump, Gotham, Metropolis, hell even China and he wouldn't have done this if he thought you weren't ready"

"I hate when you are right" I earned a chuckle form the other side of the line

"So you'll go back?"

"Yes, I'll be off tomorrow morning so I can make it to lunch but don't tell Bruce please"

"I won't but I'll call to the manor at night to see if you really did make it"

"Seriously? You're getting as bad as Bruce"

"Just doing my job here" I rolled my eyes eve if he couldn't see it "Now go to bed you have a long day tomorrow"

"Don't remind me"

"We love you" he said

"I love you too Uncle Clark and Connor too" and with that he hung up.

I went to my bed and tucked myself in before turning off my lamp light and tried to sleep, after some time tossing and turning I decided to just think about what will I do when I arrived back at the manor. Firstly I would hide in my room until a meal time, the Bruce will want to talk to me and he will make me apologize to the titans for my rudeness, the Tim will ask questions and we will have to tell the titans, yeah that would probably be it, the titans will hate me and leave and that would be the end of that. With those thoughts in my head I was pulled into a dreamless sleep for once.

Morning came too quickly for my liking and I pressed the snooze button of my alarm clock before trying to get back to sleep, a couple times later I gave up my futile efforts and got up. After I groggily took a shower I changed and packed some of my belongings in the duffel bag I had brought with me before taking my car keys and going to the garage deciding I would have some breakfast on the road or something, before I left I put on my wig and I was on my way.

It was barely midday when I arrived in Gotham, it would be at least another half an hour to the manor and that was if I went directly there, so it would take me around 50 minutes to get back to the manor. So with that thought in mind I drove downtown to get the motorcycle back and leave my car there, once I did that I went back to the manor.

I entered the ridiculously large property through one of the back doors, knowing everyone was most likely in the batcave, parked the motorcycle in its usual place and went up the service stairs up to my room. Once I reached the hallway I quickly made my way to it before dropping my things and changing into a fresh set of clothes. I looked over at y clock it was one o' clock and lunch will be served in half an hour, so I decided to go help Alfred make dessert or help cook some of the meal.

I quickly made my way to the kitchen when I saw the elderly butler sitting near the window his back turned to me. I smiled mischievously as I silently approached him and tapped him in the shoulder, only to hide in the other direction when he looked an when he looked that way I swiftly moved across and sat in front of him.

He gave a startled yelp when he saw me before putting a hand of his racing heart.

"Do you wish to kill me early Ms. Anders?" he asked once he had regained his composure

"Sorry, I just couldn't help myself"

"So, do you want me to call Master Wayne or will we just leave the surprise for lunch?" he said with a knowing look

"Let's wait for lunch. Do you want any help?" I asked knowing full well the answer

"No, I'm still perfectly capable of doing it myself, but thank you Miss" he said standing up and going to check something that was on the stove

"Ok, let me rephrase that, I'm going to at least help you with the dessert ok?" I said in my no arguments voice before I went to get some of the ingredients to make some carrot cake. Alfred just smiled and shook his head at me, but before I could even start to make the cake he spoke.

"So are you going to tell me where have you been? And do not dare lie to me young miss because I know when you do so"

"Just out of town at a friend's house" I said, technically speaking it was not a lie that apartment was bought in mine's and Connor's name (another reason for the kryptonians to know about it) for us to have halfway space we could all meet up.

"I told you not to lie to me, little missy" he said somewhat amused

"Was it Roy or Connor? No let me guess it was Uncle Clark" I said knowing full well there was no way I could actually get away with the lies or half-truths.

"I will not say who it was, for various reasons but I must say that I am shocked you would choose exactly that city, especially for the memories it holds for you" he said with some hidden worry laced towards the end

"You would never search for me there, or if you did it would be a last resort which gave me enough time to scape if needed" I said and I received a worried glance "plus it is nothing I can't handle now"

"I will never stop worrying over you, my dear girl for you have made everyone in this household a little happier and although we had some complications along the road, we have never been happier to receive someone as you and also you gave this house a much needed woman's touch" he said while he stroke my face tenderly

"I love you Alfred"

"And I do too my girl" he said while we hugged "now come we must do all of this or lunch will not be ready in time"

We spent the next 20 minutes doing our respective jobs and I finally put the cake in the oven while Alfred set the table. When he was done he came back to the kitchen to tell me if should wait here while he goes to tell everyone lunch was ready and that after everyone is seated I should go there through the main door and not the kitchen one, since it will give the illusion I just arrived. I nodded and off we went.

Once I heard everyone was seated down I took my chance and entered the dining room, all eyes settled on me. The titans were either glaring or looking at me with their best poker face while Bruce and Tim were staring at me with (ever so slightly) wide eyes.

"So… What's for lunch?" I said before I went across the room and seated in my usual seat next to Bruce

"Welcome back princess" was Tim's response and I smiled in his direction and in that moment Bruce chose to clear his throat making everyone at the table look at him

"Where have you been?" he asked finally, directing one of his famous bat glares at me

"Around" I answered with certain tone of indifference in my voice, while I scooped up some of the food Alfred had served us before placing it on my mouth and swallowing quickly

"So why the early come back?" it was Tim this time, trying to delegate between Bruce and me

"Let's just say someone discovered where I was and he told, certain teenage kryptonian who told his father, who tracked down the number of the house I was staying in and threaten to drag me here if I was not here tonight" I answered

"So basically, Uncle Clark called you to tell you off and threaten to fly you here against your will if you were not at the manor tonight?" he said with a smirk

"I like my version better"

"So who ratted you out?"

"Not telling, but I will make sure he gets some punishment"

"You are not punishing anyone Korianne , you and I are having a word after this and I will punish you as I see fit" Bruce interrupted us, I glared at him but knew better than to make a scene, that was until I saw Richard, Victor and Garfield smirking and Rachel just looked annoyed.

"What is so funny?" I asked in a sweet voice while I glared at them

They immediately looked at their plates but their smirks didn't disappear, and Rachel just shot me an annoyed look while I glared at her.

"Are you always such a bitch?" she finally asked

"No, I'm a bitch on demand. Why need someone to screw you over?"

"Why do you hate us? We have done nothing to you"

"Oh honey, you thought I hated you. That's cute. I don't hate you, if I hated you there would be a possibility of us standing each other but there is not, because I don't hate you, I despise you and what you did to one of your own, so excuse me if I don't welcome you with open arms"

"Why would know anything about it? Why would we believe someone who doesn't have any idea of what family means?"

"Leave me alone, that is not for you to know"

"Just answer the damn question, you bitch" I looked up to her with a murderous glare making sure she backed down, she stood her ground but her eyes widened once she realized she had overstepped some kind of boundary

"I'll answer the question alright. You want to know why, because my family did to me what you did to Starfire. They sold me, betrayed me and when I thought the worst had come they were murdered by the Joker. So excuse me if I have some unresolved issues but the only people who completely understood were murdered by the man who took my family in the first place Raven!"

Well damn.

Before anyone could react Bruce had stood up, glared at me and said:

"To my studio. Now!" I quickly got up and went out of the dining room, while I reached the stairs I heard Bruce apologize generally for my behavior and that they will be called later for a meeting in the library.

Once inside Bruce's studio I took a seat in one of his chair while I waited for him, it wasn't long until he stormed in.

"What the in the world were you thinking?"

"Oh c'mon I was softening the blow! And it is not my fault they started it!"

"It doesn't matter now we have to tell them!"

"Wasn't that the plan all along? Just tell them, give them a week to recover and we'll see if the world's second greatest detective can figure this out, I mean it isn't as if they hadn't considered it. It has been four years Bruce, the thought must have at least crossed their minds"

"I don't know if we should do this. Do you really want to be Kori Anders and midnight for the rest of your life? Don't you think there is still hope for you to become Starfire once again?"

"Starfire is dead, even for me Bruce and I like my life as Kori, I get to do much more than I did as Starfire, it helped me heal and get a fresh start somewhere I would have never imagined and I am happy with all of that. I have an amazing father figure, great friends, a silly little brother and so much more. I don't want to go back to being that girl, and I know why you want me to decide. I know my mental state is still somewhat fragile but going back to being Satrfire is not a way out, just let me figure things out on my own and we'll see ok?"

"You know I am no happy with it but it is your life and this way you will never have to blame me for anything." He said, I smiled I knew how to get Bruce to agree to something and being one of the only girls to ever have stayed in the Wayne manor for this long was not a bad thing either. I just really didn't want him trying to get me to be Starfire again, because in his eyes that was the solution to everything.

"We should go tell them"

"Yeah, we should"

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><p>I'm back! and I'm sorry. I know there is no excuse but better late than never right? I trully am sorry hope you still continue to read i'll try to post more frequently! Thanks for everything! I love you! review? please?<p> 


	9. Take me or Leave me

**Kori's POV**

After Bruce dismissed me, I went to my room, got a shower and changed into something more comfortable before Alfred came to tell me we were gathering at the library. I knew it was time but I didn't think I will be ever ready for that moment. As I reached my destination millions of thoughts raced through my mind but I knew I wanted to do this, I just had to.

Before I stepped in I took a deep breath and let my hand hover over the door knob before composing myself and entering the room.

Everyone was already there except for Bruce. I was obvious Tim was the first to arrive having picked his favorite spot, next to the fire place in the love seat where he was lying while he made a small talk with the titans, who were seated together in another love seat and its armrests. It all quieted down when I walked in, which was fine by me. I sat next to Tim who arranged his position so we could fit in; his arm was around me while my head rested on his chest.

Shortly after Bruce walked in and took the head of the little group, they all looked at him expectantly and he looked at me which made all the titans look between us.

"We have something to tell you" Bruce finally announced

"Actually is me who has something to tell you" Tim and Bruce exchanged a look between them before Bruce moved towards me and Tim's arm tightened around me, I squeezed his hand before I stood up next to Bruce and looked at him

"We know where Starfire is" he said

The titans looked hopeful and happy, it almost made me back out in my word. Almost

"It is not good news; you see she was here three years ago, about the time Kori came into the manor"

"What happened?" it was Victor who asked he dreaded question, Bruce looked at me as if trying to tell me not to do it but I looked straight ahead.

"It was back when Jason was Robin, so it was me, Jason and Star around the house. She had lost the ability to use her powers and we were all training in hand to hand combat when Jason told us about his plan to look for his real parents and confront them. Obviously Star and I tried to talk him out of it but he was too damn stubborn." I smiled at the memory "When Star found him trying to sneak out she decided to go with him and keep him from doing anything stupid. That was until the Joker got to them. As you know Jason died, however Starfire survived and all of our mental states became fragile at that moment especially mine and Star's. So one night, after a while since Jason's death, we went on patrol, that night some of The Joker's men attacked us and we froze for different reasons, Star recovered quickly and she snapped me out of it but we had lost the upper hand, we were fighting a losing battle. There was this one guy who had a special knife or something, I don't really remember but he got her, the worst part is that she was covering me. After that I remember calling for help and then it kind of goes blank. The next thing I know is that I woke up in my room with Bruce there; he told me that she died before we could reach the cave, he pierced some of her vital organs and she lost too much blood. I am so sorry"

There was silence for a couple of beats before they reacted. Richard was the first and the punched a wall, Rachel buried her face on Garfield's shoulder before sobs shook her delicate body, Garfield switched between trying to comfort his girlfriend and glaring at me while Victor had his head bowed and silent tears streamed down his face. The only thing I could do was watch

"IT'S ALL YOUR FAULT" Richard screamed at me, while he strode angrily towards me "WHY DID SHE HAVE TO BE WITH YOU. WE ALL KNOW YOU ARE ONE OF THE JOKER'S TARGETS! SHE NEEDED TO BE WITH SOMEONE WHO COULD PROTECT HER! THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT!" he raised his fist and I stood there frozen with fear, until I saw Bruce holding back his arm, he snatched it away but his attention was still focused on me "I hate you, you are no better than a slut" he hissed at me

"RICHARD!" It was Bruce but the damage had been done.

I started hyperventilating before my mind had time to process what I was doing I felt Tim's touch at my side in less than five seconds but I could barely hear him anymore, I tries to concentrate in his touch but the flashbacks began before I could do so and in my mind everything went blank.

**Tim's POV **

I reached Kori once I saw what was happening and tried to soothe her, but she already had a faraway look on her eyes. I looked up to Bruce who quickly came to our side and picked her up bridal style as she trashed and screamed.

"Go to my room and look in my night table's drawer if there are still some sedatives, if not go tell Alfred, he should have some. Now, Tim!"

I rushed out of the library while the Titans stared at the scene unfolding before them; I rushed to Bruce's room, cursing all the way at the distance. Once there I rummaged as quickly as possible for the sedatives. Luckily I found one and then rushed a couple doors sown to Kori's room. To my surprise Alfred was already there, finishing arranging the bed so we didn't have to struggle to get Kori in and before I could utter a word he took the sedative from my hands and began to put it in the syringe with practiced ease. Not a minute later Bruce burst into the room still carrying a screaming and frightened Kori. He placed her on the bed and I moved to the other side to try to keep her still until the medicine took effect. A minute later Alfred had already injected the medicine in her body and she started to calm as the drug began to so its work.

"She'll be fine now" Alfred announced

"How did you know?" I asked

"I heard Master Dick's outburst, and although understandable, I have to say he did not have the right to say those awful things to Miss Anders" there was a slight tone of disappointment in his voice

"I'll go talk to him. I hate to do this but, he is a young man now and he should know better, plus with Kori's state of mind and problems I have to make her my priority over Richard" Bruce said, as if trying to explain himself

"Go I'll stay with Kori for a while. He needs you right now Bruce, go" I said before he nodded and left the room

"Call us if something changes, Master Tim" Alfred said before he took his leave

I sighed and played with Kori's hair, wondering when this all will be over.

**Bruce's POV**

I headed towards Richard's room; his room hadn't changed his he left the manor the yellow danger sign is still there since he was at least thirteen. I knock on his door knowing it is most likely closed.

"What?" his voice comes from the other side of the door

"May I come in?" I ask gently

I hear the door unlock and I was greeted with a red eyed Richard, his lips are pressed to a thin line and he look, overall, awful.

"Why didn't you tell me?" he finally asks in a whisper

"You have to understand Richard, losing Jason was hard on all of us and not even half a year later we lost Starfire, and we all snapped in our own ways but Kori was recuperating after the traumatic events she suffered and she tried to kill herself. Starfire and Jason were her biggest supports and losing them was too much for all of us, I didn't want to lose her too, so she became my main priority. We didn't think telling you in that moment was convenient, fearing how you will react, so we waited until Kori was more stable and you had at least considered the possibility. We never wanted to hurt you and Starfire asked us to not tell you of her whereabouts, until it was convenient and we respected her wishes."

"But when I came for Jason's funeral…." His voice trailed off

"She was recovering in a mental hospital and Kori was trying to keep it together, so they stayed together for support"

"I just…I just…" and with that Richard completely broke down. All I could do was hold the boy who I considered my son and try to comfort him. We stayed like that for what felt like an eternity. His hands clung to my shirt like when he was a little boy too scared about a nightmare.

"It's ok Dick, it will be alright. Shhh… it will be okay. Everything will be fine" I kept whispering reassuring words to my eldest son until he had calmed down enough to think straight again.

"I really screwed up with Kori didn't I?" he said wiping his eyes

"It is understandable but, yeah you did" I said softly

"Is this why she doesn't like us? Because Star died?" he said and I could see fresh tears forming in his eyes. I wiped them away before they could fall

"Sort of. She thinks that if she wouldn't have come here she would still be alive and well living happily with you, but yeah they used to be like best friends or whatever cheesy thing girls call it these days. So she told Kori everything and Kori, who is very much like you, overprotective and willing to sacrifice everything for those she loves, found out the reason Starfire was here and unable to use her powers she got mad at the people who hurt someone she cared about so much, it all just got worse when Star died. She thought it was all a chain reaction and that, even though they wouldn't have met, it would be better if she stayed in Jump as part of the titans."

"I should go and apologize" he said standing up

"It is not the best idea" he shot me a weird look " first she is sedated and we don't really know how much strain that attack caused her body and mind, so we don't know how long she will be resting and second Tim will most likely kill you if you go near her. He is very protective of his sister" that earned me surprised look from Richard

"They call each other that?"

"Yes, I know you try your best to have a close relationship with my new wards. But there is only so much you can do. They live here and see each other every day, it is impossible to keep them from forming a closer bond than you and Jason or you and Tim"

"I understand. Thanks Bruce for being here for me, but I must go check on my team. I need to know how they are holding up"

"It's ok. I'll should probably go and check on Tim, he tends to over work himself when Kori is like this. Oh and dinner will be ready in about two hours so I expect you to be there and explain things to your team too."

"Will do, Bruce"

And with a small and rare hug we parted ways

**Kori's POV **

_-Flashback-_

"_Are you stupid Jason?" I said angrily to him _

"_I have to find out Star" he answered honestly _

"_A parent is not the person who gave birth to you, but the one who cared for you and loved you, believe me. I should know"_

_He stopped punching the bag in front of him. We were in the batcave training. It had been six months since I first came here and my diction had finally been fixed. Jason looked at me, he had just told me about his plan to search for his real mother but I simply had to oppose at such a ridiculous idea._

"_But I need to know, Star. I need to know the reasons for them leaving me, I mean people are always leaving me and I just don't get it at times you know?" he said looking at me _

"_Jason…. I will never leave you ok? Even if Bruce kicks us out I never will leave your side. You are stuck with me for the rest of eternity" I saw a smile spread on his lips and I knew I had said the right thing. "Now come here" I said as I tackled him to a hug which turned into a tickle war a minute later_

"_NO JASON! WAIT!"_

"_YOU'RE JUST DOING THIS TO HOLD ME BACK LIKE BRUCE! YOU TWO ARE JUST THE SAME!"_

"_YOU WILL GET YOURSELF KILLED"_

"_I DON'T CARE!"_

"_WELL I DO!"_

"_LIKE HELL YOU DO. I KNOW WHAT YOU AE DOING AND I WILL NOT LET YOU. I HATE YOU STARFIRE! I HATE YOU! THERE IS NO WONDER WHY THE TITANS LEFT YOU!" _

_That was the moment everything crumbled…._

_I was back at the manor, everything was silent... too silent, Jason had always been the one to make noise; he never liked the silence for long. I stared at myself in the mirror. Stupid, worthless, ugly, weak. That was what I saw. I shattered the mirror at once, before running a hand in my now short hair in an attempt to calm myself down. _

"_Every effort was futile, he died and you couldn't stop it. Hell you can't even calm yourself. You are stupid and worthless and a slut. Jason hated you, the titans hated you, and Bruce and Alfred probably hate you too. You are a disgrace. You should just die" I thought_

_And with that I saw my only way out. _

_Suicide _

_-End of Flashback- _

My eyes shot open and I sat before taking in my surroundings. A moment later I realized I was in my room. How did I get here? How long was I out? And then realization hit me. I fought the urge to curse, before checking the time in my digital clock.

9:05 pm

I sighted in relief as I realized that I wasn't out long, but then I heard the somewhat muffled voice of Bruce talking on the other side of my door.

"…fine, Clark" oh, right Uncle Clark was going to call me "she's asleep right now" a pause "She'll probably be awake tomorrow, it wasn't that bad or that long" another pause "no don't tell Connor, god know I have enough young heroes here….. I know he heard but you are his father" a sigh "put him on the phone, by the way try to intimidate the boy once in a while" I heard him pacing outside the door until "Hello Connor…she's fine you know? And don't you have school or something?" silence "…Right, but you sure want to spend some time with your friends and isn't your prom this week?" a laugh "how about this I'll force Tim and Kori to call you as soon as she wakes up alright? … Ok put your dad back on the phone. Bye Connor" Silence "You'll stop him if he tries to come right? ... No they don't know that" sigh "I have to check on her ok? Bye Clark and thanks"

I hurried back to my bed, to pretend I was not eavesdropping on his conversation. When the door opened I sat on the side as if tried to get up just then, Bruce looked tired but once he saw me sitting a small smile spread over his face

"Hey Kori, how are you feeling?" he asked softly

"I feel fine, a little groggy but fine. How long was I out?"

"Just the whole afternoon. You remember what happened right?"

"Yeah, panic attack huh?" I said trying to lighten the mood

"I'm sorry"

"It's not your fault, and it was bound to happen sometime Bruce. Relax I'm fine" I said with a soft smile but added "but you should get Tim, you know how he gets when this happens"

And with that Bruce bolted out of the room, it was funny to see the much serious Batman run to get one of wards so, said person wouldn't be mad at him and refuse to do the investigations. Not even a minute a later I was being tackled to my bed by Tim while Bruce decided it was amusing to watch form the doorway

"Get off me you hippo!" I said as I tried pushing my little brother away

"Kori, don't ever do that again. You had me worried" he said as he finally allowed me to sit back up

"You know I don't control it, but I'll try to hang on a little longer next time ok?" For that I just received a hug as a response "why don't we go to the roof and talk about this while Bruce goes to get ready for your patrol. We won't be long I promise" I directed the last part to Bruce who just nodded and disappeared down the corridor

We quickly got to the roof of the manor, a place where I came out of habit and where we could have some privacy to talk, if we needed to. And I knew Tim will never let me off the hook if I didn't talk to him, so we sat there watching the stars for a while.

"So who was it this time?" it was a sort of routine, Tim would always break the silence when we needed to talk.

"Just Jason" I said truthfully, and Tim inspected my face as if trying to decide whether I was lying or not

"It wasn't just him this time was it?" I sighed before resting my head on his shoulder and letting a beat or two of silence pass

"It was the first time I tried to kill myself" his arm tightened around me in a sign of comfort, I had only admitted to Tim I had tried to take my life several times before the time I actually did it and if it weren't for Bruce or Alfred I wouldn't be here. "It was the night Jason died, and that horrible voice at the back of my head just kept telling me all kind of awful things. I couldn't help but freak out again. I'm sorry if I scared you"

"You know we love you right?"

"And I love you too"

We sat in silence just watching the stars twinkle for some more time, before we heard steps behind us. We immediately turned prepared to tell Bruce that we will be in the Batcave in two minutes but instead found Richard awkwardly standing there

"Um… I didn't know you were here, so I'll just go um…somewhere else"

"No stay, I was just leaving. Bruce will kill me if I am not ready in like 5 minutes" Tim said

Richard's gaze flickered between Tim and me before sitting himself near me, while Tim left.

"Tell Bruce I'll be down in ten so I can manage all communications and information tonight" I yelled after him before hearing a faint ok as a response.

"So do you come here often?" asked Richard after a few minutes of silence, I decided to give him the time of the day and act civil towards him

"Usually to watch the sunset. I really like all the colors and how everything looks at that time of the day" I said which was not a lie

"So why are you here at night today?"

"Well, I wasn't awake by sunset, and Tim and I come here to talk from time to time"

"Right, sorry" he said

"So… how are you holding up? I know how hard it can be" I said sympathetically. My question must have caught him off guard because he looked at me, shocked, for a few seconds.

"I'm fine, I guess. We thought about it for a while about two years ago and we had time to cope with her not being around. It's just tough, we all had some hope one day we might find her, explain ourselves and bring her back home"

"It was not wrong to have hoped for the best, but why did you search for her for four years? Many would have given up by now" it was silent for another few minutes and Richard just looked to the stars above us

"Because I love her and it was foolish of me to let her go, especially like that" a gasp almost escaped my lips but then I remembered everything and forced the warm feeling inside me to cease to exist, at least for a while

"Do you think you will ever stop loving her?" I asked before I could process my words through my mind

"No. She was the greatest thing to happen to me and I was too blind to see it, but I'll never stop loving her because of that very reason" silence came for a couple more minutes before he laughed to himself "Now you are actin civil towards me?"

"Let's just say that I understand what you are going through and I will be less of a bitch to any of you, from now on that is" I said somewhat playfully. He just laughed

"Hey, I wanted to apologize for earlier. It was totally out of line for me to say those words to you, I didn't really mean them but I feel awful. I didn't know you would react that way or that you suffered from panic attacks for that matter" the acrobat said sheepishly

"It's ok, and not many people know I get them if they knew I would probably be suspended from helping the JLA and be forced to therapy or something and I don't want to have to do that, so can you keep it a secret please?" I asked and he nodded

"How about we start over? Like from total zero" the idea sounded tempting I could meet them a Kori and forget my past as Starfire with them

"Fine"

"Hello, I'm Richard Grayson" he said extending his hand

"I'm Kori Anders, nice to meet you" I said taking it and shaking it

"Pleasure is all mine" he grinned

What we didn't know is that this will be the beginning for them to know the actual truth.

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><p>so yeah, they finally talked! Yay! we'll see a little bit more of all of the heroes arround here! (i may have been reading a lot of DC comics lately)<p>

i own nothing!

Reviews are love! and I love you!


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